Life in the Box: Pandemic of Laughter

So, we’ve been at this stay-at-home-thing long enough to laugh at it, I guess. The internet jokes just keep rolling on in. Who writes all these? Who makes all those memes and vids? Everyone, it seems.

My favorite silly video right now is the kitties leaping over the toilet paper rolls. 

But there is a lot of humor to choose from. I’m still on email, so I get some lists of one-liners which I’ll share (see below.)

And magazine writers are sharing their favorite pandemic jokes; here’s Esquire’s. 

Have you tried Bored Panda? One collection page will lead you to another. The Guinea pig museum isn’t really a joke, it’s an amusing stroll through art history for guinea pigs. 

There is a mix of the vulgar and sweet Tweet selections on Vulture. They update almost daily. I know some will offend (with sexual references mostly), but some are really funny, so take it or leave it.

And, of course late-night comedy from the professionals is sometimes actually worth a chuckle. The Washington Post looks at a sampling.

It should be noted that most of the jokes are about our discomfort with all the changes in our personal lives and businesses, and are based on the assumption that we’re fine, just bored.

Very little is aimed at the mounting deaths, the fear caused by lack of hospital supplies and surging outbreaks caused by the people who deny it all and are coughing in the face of the new reality.

And hopefully we’ll never see jokes making fun of people who can’t pay their rent, get food, or get medicine.

But, okay, there are different simultaneous realities, and since I’m lucky to be healthy and safe so far, I do appreciate a grin and a giggle. Bring on the Olympic cats jumping over (plentiful) rolls of toilet paper.

Compendium of pandemic jokes: (I did not write these… don’t blame me!)

Quarantine has turned us into dogs. We roam the house all day looking for food. We are told “no” if we get too close to strangers. And we get really excited about car rides

The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house, and their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!

This virus has done what no woman had been able to do…cancel all sports, shut down all bars, and keep men at home!!!

Do not call the police on suspicious people in your neighborhood! Those are your neighbors without makeup and hair extensions!

Since we can’t eat out, now’s the perfect time to eat better, get fit, and stay healthy. We’re quarantined! Who are we trying to impress? We have snacks, we have sweatpants – I say we use them!

Day 7 at home and the dog is looking at me like, “See? This is why I chew the furniture!”

Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands???

I never thought the comment “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6 foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!

Me: Alexa what’s the weather this weekend?

Alexa: It doesn’t matter – you’re not going anywhere.

Can everyone please just follow the government instructions so we can knock out this coronavirus and be done?! I feel like a kindergartner who keeps losing more recess time because one or two kids can’t follow directions.

I swear my fridge just said “what the hell do you want now?”

When this is over…what meeting do I attend first…Weight Watchers or AA?

I need to practice social-distancing… from the refrigerator.

PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well.

Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the job.

I don’t think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we’d go from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone.

This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog….. we laughed a lot.

So, after this quarantine…..will the producers of My 300 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?

Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

I’m so excited — it’s time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I’m getting tired of Los Livingroom.

Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said “I hope I don’t have the same teacher next year”…. I’m offended.

[meteor hitting earth]
Dinosaur: Oh no the economy !!

Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under

Nancy Heather Brown is a retired, Emmy Award-winning television producer whose career has included interviewing, writing, narrating and editing for a span of four decades. Today, she enjoys learning new things and reflecting upon the creative process and life issues, both inside and outside the box. Her opinions are her own, and are not necessarily those of this web site.

Blaming housemates for being bad co-workers